Making the decision to get a divorce means choosing to begin a new life. Much of what an individual took for granted as a married person will likely be very different as a single person. It is important to give consideration to how that new life will function, most especially the financial aspects. Those considering a collaborative law approach to separation in British Columbia have a unique chance to sit down and discuss those aspects with their soon-to-be former partner and with legal advisers.
One American expert says there are four key financial areas to think about during a divorce. The first is the division of assets. Everything a couple owns needs to be either disposed of or taken into someone’s possession. This includes anything from real estate and vehicles, down to appliances, electronics and even home decor.
Accumulated debt is the second aspect, and it is, unfortunately, something that needs to be shared between former partners. How these debts will be managed will be a key part of divorce proceedings. Thirdly, how a married couple’s tax situation will change needs to be investigated. For example, the possible sale of real estate will impact each person’s capital gains for the year. And if there are children, the matter of child benefit payments needs to be considered.
Which leads to the fourth and final aspect: children. Raising a child is expensive, and it is a good idea to agree early upon how the child or children will be supported after the divorce. Custody arrangements must be made, and possibly support payments will have to be set up.
Family law in British Columbia sets out guidelines for the division of assets after a divorce. However, there is still much to be discussed and settled for any couple that is separating. Using the services of a family law firm may take much of the stress and worry out of divorce proceedings by utilizing collaborative law to help create a plan for a financially sustainable future.
Source: goodmenproject.com, “4 Top Money Issues In Divorce“, Colin Amos, Oct. 24, 2016
There are two basic ways to go about settling a divorce: litigation, or alternative dispute resolution. For British Columbia parents that are separating, it may be preferable to choose collaborative law and avoid the courts when it comes to determining custody arrangements, whether during the actual divorce, or down the road if situations change. One former couple has found out recently how deeply into their personal lives the courts can reach.
The ex-spouses share custody of a son who is now 4 years old. The boy had been showing signs of a gender identity issue, and the mother eventually chose to support her son, allowing him to identify himself as a girl and wear girls’ clothing. Shortly after informing the child’s father of her decision, she was served with papers alleging that the boy’s issue was her fault, and that the father was seeking primary custody.
Once in court, a judge ruled in Dec. 2015, that the boy would henceforth be required to wear boys’ clothes only when he was in public. A second hearing in Feb. 2016, before a different judge, resulted in the upholding of the original ruling on clothing, plus custody was granted to the father. The mother was reduced to limited access to her son. And in Sept. 2016, a third judge amended the previous ruling, allowing the boy to choose the clothes he wanted from a selection of both boys’ and girls’ items.
Though this is an unusual example, this family now has their private business making news across the country. Having personal issues of any sort decided by the courts may feel highly invasive to families. For that reason, former couples that feel they can still reach an understanding may be better served by each securing the services of a British Columbia law firm experienced with collaborative law.
Source: CBC News Calgary, “Medicine Hat judges ordered 4-year-old not to wear girls’ clothes in public“, Colleen Underwood, Oct. 31, 2016
During divorce proceedings, or even long after a separation has taken place, former couples with children will strive to do what they feel is best for the kids. For British Columbia residents, this may mean using collaborative law to come to an agreement on custody arrangements and visitation rights. However, when ex-partners can’t agree on a solution, the case may be taken to court and left to a judge to decide.
In June 2015, a woman and her ex-husband were in court regarding their three children, 13, 10 and 9 years old. The exes had been fighting each other for about five years, and the woman was using her 16th lawyer, the man his fourth or fifth. The register logging all their hearings now stretches to 55 pages.
At the heart of a June 24, 2015 court appearance was the children’s refusal to visit with their father, despite a court order. Out of apparent frustration, the judge is alleged to have directed inappropriate language and abuse toward the children, even comparing the eldest child to convicted murderer and cultist Charles Manson. In the end, she sentenced all three children to 17 days in a juvenile detention centre.
Though this shocking case is certainly an exception rather than the rule, parents who fight over their children in court do risk exposing the kids to unpleasant situations and outcomes. If the option seems reasonable to both parties, it may be preferable to work towards a compromise with the help of a team experienced in collaborative law. Contacting a family law firm in British Columbia is a great place to start planning the best possible future for children after a divorce.
Source: wzzm13.com, “Panel urges 30-day suspension for Oakland County Judge Lisa Gorcyca“, John Wisely, Nov. 15, 2016
Children will experience varying reactions to the divorce of their parents, according to a report published on Nov. 28 by the American Academy of Pediatrics. The variables impacting those reactions include their degree of emotional development and age. Behavioural changes are common during the first year after a divorce or separation and may persist for as long as three years. The report goes on to say special occasions, like birthdays and holidays, may bring back the sense of loss, even years later.
The report suggests that parents consult with a pediatrician. Pediatricians are able to understand a child’s emotions based on their behaviour and may be able to shed some light for parents on what their children are feeling. Parents are further urged to keep an open dialogue with their children, and answer their questions honestly, in an age-appropriate manner. Maintaining routines, where possible, can also help a child adjust to the new family situation.
Doing what’s best for the children should be top of mind for all parents going through a divorce. One of the best ways of doing that is by making arrangements together instead of fighting over each decision. By working with lawyers who utilize collaborative law in British Columbia, it may be possible to come to a series of agreements that work for everyone involved.
Source: aap.org, “AAP Clinical Report Details How To Help Children Through Divorce, Separation“, Accessed on Nov. 28, 2016
Everyone wants to save money when they can, especially on things that aren’t enjoyable. It may come as a surprise to some that there are ways to cut costs on a divorce, a process nearly synonymous with major expenses and financial pitfalls. One financial expert has recently shared tips on how to be fiscally responsible during a divorce, and using collaborative law might be one of the keys for people in British Columbia considering a separation.
The first step should be an ongoing one in anyone’s life: being aware of one’s own finances. That entails being cognizant of what one’s assets are and what they’re worth. It also means knowing what one owes and to whom. Additionally, on should keep tabs on all of one’s income streams and annual expenditures. Knowing these things in advance and having ready access to important financial records will save time if a divorce comes to pass.
Keeping one’s emotions in check as much as possible can also help save money and enable better decision making. As an example, the expert cites the family home: while one may be attached to it sentimentally, keeping it might not be the best financial decision for everyone. Guilt and anger are also bad emotional foundations for settling a divorce, and they may get in the way of what’s really important.
One last piece of advice from the expert is to settle out of court, if possible. Litigation can be very expensive, and favourable results are far from guaranteed. Taking advantage of the processes of collaborative law may help two people settle their differences, divide their assets and move on with their lives in as efficient a manner as possible. An experienced British Columbia-based family law firm is well equipped to assist a couple or an individual achieve this goal.
Source: BNN, “5 ways to juggle the financial pitfalls of divorce“, Pattie Lovett-Reid, Dec. 2, 2016
The winter holidays are a time of joy for happy families across British Columbia. For those men and women who are unhappy in their marriage, however, it can be an emotional time for entirely different reasons. Thoughts of divorce can be upsetting, and no one wants to be upset or bring others down during this festive season. While ending a marriage is never a fun thing to think about, it may be the right time to consider how to proceed, and interested parties may wonder if collaborative law is the way to go.
Seeing other families enjoying themselves, and enduring the strain of trying to keep smiling, can be very difficult on a person who wants to end his or her marriage. In order to avoid ruing the holidays, however, many men and women attempt to put off taking action until the season has passed. For that reason, some lawyers refer to January as “divorce month.”
Statistics indicate that internet searches for divorce-related terms increase by as much as 50 percent during December and January. Similar reports of seasonally increased divorce filings have been reported in a study in the United States. That study showed spikes in divorces through the first three months of the year and again in September after the summer holidays have ended.
While emotions can never be entirely held in check during divorce proceedings, it is important that they never be allowed to get the better of a person. One way to attempt to keep them controlled is to try to resolve matters via collaborative law instead of litigation. With the assistance of a British Columbia family law attorney, an individual can work with his or her spouse instead of fighting. This may be a less emotionally damaging way to achieve a much-needed divorce.
Source: The Globe and Mail, “How unhappy couples survive the holidays and what happens next“, Dave McGinn, Dec. 20, 2016
When two people choose to end their marriage, it is rarely a decision reached without expressing at least a few negative emotions. It may be hoped, however, that a separation agreement can be reached without undue acrimony so that both parties may move on with their lives as expediently as possible. In British Columbia, people may choose to take advantage of the collaborative law process in order to settle their differences in relative peace. Clearly, two Hollywood celebrities currently in the news did not choose this path.
Singer Robin Thicke and actress Paula Patton announced their divorce three years ago, and yet the custody battle over their now 6-year-old son, Julian, still continues. In the latest development, Patton has accused Thicke of abusing the boy, allegations which are being investigated by the Los Angeles County Department of Child and Family Services. Patton has reportedly blocked Thicke’s access to their son, and she filed an emergency order for an adjustment to their current custody agreement that would limit his visitation to supervised visits during daytime hours only.
In his defence, Thicke claims he has spanked the child for discipline, but only lightly and on rare occasions as a last resort. He further claims this level of discipline is in keeping with an agreement made with Patton while the two were still married. In his opinion, this was an attempt at revenge after Patton was denied an invitation to the funeral for Thicke’s father, actor Alan Thicke, in December 2016. A judge dismissed Patton’s request for limited access.
Very few people have the details of their divorce or child custody dispute written about in the news. Nevertheless, even a private citizen may suffer as the result of a possibly vindictive attempt to alter an arrangement, and certainly, the children may suffer, as well. Agreements made via collaborative law are more likely to be adhered to in the future because of the circumstances in which they were created. By working with a British Columbia family law firm, it may be possible to cooperate with an ex-spouse rather than come to conflict.
Source: National Post, “Paula Patton accuses ex-husband Robin Thicke of abusing their son amid bitter custody battle“, Sadaf Ahsan, Jan. 13, 2017
It is not over-generalizing to suggest that someone who is going to be paying spousal support usually feels a lower dollar figure is sufficient than does the would-be recipient. British Columbia men and women about to enter divorce proceedings may wish to consider the case of an affluent couple who could not agree on a suitable figure and ended up making the news, their private business laid out for public consumption. This is an excellent example of the value of collaborative law, regardless of income level.
The couple in question had chosen to end their marriage after 23 years. They had made their home in one of the most prestigious neighbourhoods in the country and lived a lifestyle to suit the environment. Their three children all attend an elite private school, and the couple also owns a townhouse in a resort community. The husband has been involved at an ownership level with numerous successful businesses, and the wife is a former lawyer who gave up practising to stay at home with the children. She is seeking interim support payments in keeping with her accustomed lifestyle, and based on his annual income of approximately $1.8 million.
In court, the man argued that he earned a mere $275,000 each year, and that any support payments should be based on that figure. He attributed the previous year’s high earnings to a one-time real estate sale, and that he and his ex-wife were able to live lavishly because of the generosity of his parents, who no longer felt obligated to help out now that the marriage was over. The judge, however, noted the man was still able to drive a new Mercedes and pay $12,000 per month in rent. In the end, he ruled in favour of the woman, deciding that she was entitled to continue living the way she was accustomed, regardless of where the man’s money was coming from.
In any litigated divorce, whether the assets are newsworthy or more modest, there may be a struggle over support payments. Ultimately, a judge will rule based on British Columbia support guidelines, despite any objections from either party. As an alternative, couples may choose instead to negotiate a settlement via collaborative law. Such an approach may allow for a more agreeable solution for both parties, and one that is still enforceable. A family law attorney can help a man or woman initiate and negotiate a support agreement.
Source: Toronto Sun, “Crying poor doesn’t work for Forest Hill lawyer in divorce court“, Michele Mandel, Jan. 19, 2017
When parents cannot agree on what’s best for their child during or after a divorce, sometimes matters can become unpleasant. Recently, a child custody dispute spanning halfway around the world found its way to a courtroom east of British Columbia. This unusually convoluted case has seen an Amber Alert, a warrant for an arrest and stories of a sex and murder factory in a far-off land. Collaborative law is clearly no longer an option for this family.
A woman from Canada claiming her 9-year-old daughter was in danger at her home in Egypt, appeared in a Canadian court fighting for custody in Jan. 2017. In Dec. 2016, a nationwide warrant for her arrest went out after she failed to show at a Dec. 2 hearing. Furthermore, an Amber Alert was issued for her daughter, who was believed to be in her custody. The mother claimed she was protecting her daughter, who she alleges was sexually abused by her father.
During the proceedings, videotaped interviews the mother made of the child telling her story were under scrutiny. The child repeatedly alleged she was assaulted by her father, and made reference to a building with 500 rooms where groups of men committed murder and had sex. The judge did not believe any of the allegations, saying that they were most likely made up by the child under coaching from her mother. On Jan. 30, he ruled the girl would be given over to her father, and the two could return to Egypt where the case could resume.
In cases of genuine abuse, or in the presence of other reasons for a parent to fear for the safety or welfare of his or her child, litigation may be the only course of action available. If false allegations are made, however, matters will be unnecessarily prolonged, likely to the detriment of the child. Where possible, collaborative law solutions are far preferable to courtroom fights. An experienced and caring British Columbia family law attorney may be able to help in either situation.
Source: niagarafallsreview.ca, “Allegations dismissed as “a malicious contrivance” in Amber Alert case“, Allan Benner, Jan. 30, 2017
No matter how one approaches it, divorce can be a difficult and emotional life event. There are ways, however, in which it may be possible to alleviate some of the stress and make a relatively clean break. Using collaborative law may be one of the best methods available to men and women in British Columbia.
Most people going through divorce are good, caring folks who once loved their partners. Regardless of the current state of the relationship, many people are loath to hurt their former spouse. Some men and women report feeling stress at having caused their exes emotional pain. It may be possible to minimize that pain by working together through the process of ending a marriage.
A more practical reason to work with rather than against one’s spouse has to do with finances. While the courts will settle the division of assets and the awarding of support with or without the agreement of the two parties, this isn’t the only way. In all likelihood, the two people who know their marital property and personal finances best are also best suited to decide how to split them up. Negotiating a division may end up being more pleasing in the end than settling for what’s given, and can help both parties avoid financial surprises.
Another consideration is children. Any couple with children typically try hard to avoid fighting over or around their kids. Ugly scenes can leave children emotionally scarred and parents estranged. A better choice would be to work together to make parenting plans, and show the kids that mom and dad are still a parenting team who love them.
Divorce may be an unfortunate occurrence, but for those who cannot avoid it, it doesn’t have to be emotionally traumatic. Collaborative law allows a couple to split with dignity and respect, and maybe a few more dollars in their individual pockets. A British Columbia family law firm can help to make this possible.
Source: The Huffington Post, “10 Lessons I Learned From My Divorce (So You Won’t Have To)“, Haywood Hunt, Feb. 16, 2017
